


The Ruins of Castle Byers (or, the day Will came back)

by Autisticpunk13



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, BAMF Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Best Friends, Biphobia, Bisexual Mike Wheeler, Characters play D&D, Childhood Friends, Denial of Feelings, Dustin Henderson is a Good Friend, Eleven | Jane Hopper Needs A Hug, Eventual Fluff, Internalized Homophobia, Lucas Sinclair Is a Good Friend, M/M, Maxine "Max" Mayfield is a Good Friend, Mike Wheeler Being an Idiot, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Oblivious Mike Wheeler, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Relationship(s), Post-Canon Fix-It, Slow Burn, Smart Dustin Henderson, Stranger Things Spoilers, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-20
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2020-07-09 12:26:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 10,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19887805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autisticpunk13/pseuds/Autisticpunk13
Summary: When he saw the ruins the first time, he knew he had to fix it. And maybe, he hoped, fixing Castle Byers would help fix him and Will.But then Will left. And all Mike had of him was some old pictures, the D&D set, and his memories. It wasn't enough. It was never enough. So he went out, and he found Castle Byers.





	1. Fixing Things (a prologue.)

When he saw the ruins the first time, he knew he had to fix it. And maybe, he hoped, fixing Castle Byers would help fix him and Will. 

But then Will left. And all Mike had of him was some old pictures, the D&D set, and his memories. It wasn't enough. It was never enough. So he went out, and he found Castle Byers. 

•••••••••••••••••••••••••

Mike knew he could never really fix everything, but he hoped that fixing Castle Byers would help him, at least a little. So that's what he did. 

It started about few weeks after Will had moved. It still hurt Mike to think about it, so he didn't. He focused on Eleven, but that.... didn't work out. They split, but they didn't fight. They just.... weren't ready. They still talked, and hung out, and Mike was okay with that. He was okay. 

And he kept telling himself, I'm okay, I'm okay. But he knew he wasn't. And how could he be? His best friend moved away, his first girlfriend broke up with him, and he's still dealing with the nightmares, the jumpiness, the fear, the, the Everything that the upside-down had caused. 

So instead of thinking about it, he focused on other things. At first, he tried to focus on D&D, but it wasn't right without Will. Then he tried to focus on comics, but the wild worlds and strong superheroes didn't hold a candle to his own life. Horror movies were out, because how could he watch a horror movie without his friends at his side? 

Max and Lucas spent most of their time with each other, either at the arcade or at home, watching movies. Dustin spent most of his time talking to Suzie or hanging out with Steve. Mike felt....alone. 

So when everything else failed him, he went and found Castle Byers. It was almost as pathetic as it was that cold night, still damp and torn-apart. But he ignored the pit in his stomach, the tears in his eyes, and the fact that his new jeans were already getting dirty, and he went to work, trying to fix everything. 


	2. Fixing things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mike starts to rebuild. He finds something he thought was lost, and he tries to ignore his feelings.

I knew it would take days, probably weeks before it was fixed. Especially since the nights were coming sooner, and the weather was getting colder, and the schoolwork kept piling up. But that didn't matter. I have my trusty rain jacket, my equally trusty bike, a flashlight, and I can just do my homework at the Castle Byers. It would all be fine. Everything would be fine. 

So I started. I tried to keep the last of the walls up as best as possible, but really only parts of the back wall and the left wall stayed. The new owner doesn't care if I'm out here, she's just an old lady that doesn't even know Castle Byers is here. And that's okay.

And I know, I know, Mom says I should try to work this out with a therapist, so I can "deal with my issues." I don't have issues, not really. I mean, I'd say I'm doing pretty well, all things considered. But I don't really focus on that. I focus on trying to clean up this place, so I can actually start rebuilding. So I can fix it. 

But honestly, digging through the wet leaves and rotted wood that used to be my best friend's favorite place, is not a fun time. But it's necessary, so I do it. I drag the wood and the leaves away, and I dig through them to see if there's anything Will left. I haven't found anything yet, but I'm holding out hope. I know he took all the books and blankets and pillows, and the signs got rotted probably, but...I need this little bit of hope. I'm lost in my thoughts, but something manages to catch my eye. It looks like paper. 

I pick it up, and turn it over. It's a picture, from our last Halloween. It's ripped, but not completely. God, that was a fun night. I mean, the MindFlayer kinda ruined it, but. It was still fun.

A water droplet falls on the picture, and I look up. The sky's clear blue, so it can't be rain. I wipe my eyes, my hands coming away wet. I'm not seriously crying over a picture, am I? Come on Mike, boys don't cry over dumb things like pictures, that's just weak. Rubbing my eyes harder just makes them hurt, but I deal with it and get on, shoving the picture in my pocket, even as the tears in my eyes threaten to spill over again. I have no idea how long this is going to take. I know it took Will a night, but he had Jonathan helping him. I'm on my own, so it'll probably take a few days. 

I haven't found anything else lying around, so I figure it's time to try and get the rest of the walls up. I explore the surrounding woods, looking for big enough branches to hold up the walls. I also have an old blanket for the door, and more blankets and pillows for inside, but those will be the last step. I drag the branches back, and I start fixing the back wall. There wasn't that much damage to the back, so that's a pretty easy fix, as soon as I find branches that fit. 

Soon enough, I fall into a sort of rhythm of finding branches, dragging them back, and pushing them into place, and my mind drifts off. How's El doing? I know she's still not going to school, Joyce knows that that would be too dangerous, even without her powers. I hope she's doing alright. I hope the TV stations in her new town play her favorite shows. I know Jonathan's probably already got a job at the nearest newspaper or photographer. Has Will made any new friends? Does his new town have a cool movie theater or an arcade or something? Is his new house cool? Is he doing alright without us? 

I mutter these thoughts to myself quietly, even though no one else can hear me. I've finished the back wall and I'm finally almost done with the left wall, but it's starting to get dark. I really should have left my house earlier, but Mom insisted that I eat lunch at home. 

I wish I could stay here all night. But I can't, not without my mother freaking out. Honestly, I don't blame her. A lot of stuff has happened lately, and I was in the middle of a lot of it. I just wish she'd worry less. But she won't, so I grab my bike off the ground, and get on. I hesitate, not really sure why, and look back at Castle Byers. It looks sad still, kind of pathetic, in a way. But, it also looks better. A small smile breaks across my face, and I ignore the weird feeling in my chest as I bike home in the quiet twilight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates every Tuesday!! I don't really have a beta reader so if you notice a mistake/misspelling please tell me! 
> 
> Also today's my 17th birthday, so that's pretty cool.


	3. Movie night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Literally just what it says on the chapter title. Kind of a softer, filler chapter. Have fun.

Knock knock

Two firm gentle knocks interrupt my very important movie selecting process. I get to choose the movies this week, and I'm in the mood for some classic horror. After the MindFlayer showed up the second time, we started doing weekly movie nights. I think we felt like we were drifting away, and none of us wanted that. 

Knock knock!  
Two louder knocks sound against the door. I roll my eyes to myself and push myself off the floor, setting the movies to the side. I run to the door, and open it as Max, Dustin, and Lucas rush in. 

"Hey Mike!" Dustin's the first to actually say anything, but he's always been the friendliest of us. And often the loudest. The other two chime in with "Hey's" of their own. Lucas and Max are holding hands, which means they've probably made up after their last argument. Probably. 

Dustin and Max run down to the basement, as I grab the movies, and Lucas rummages around the kitchen for junk food. Lucas is over at my house so much, he knows this kitchen better than I do, honestly. It's sort of a comforting sight, seeing him in my kitchen like he lives here. At least some things haven't changed. He gathers what he can hold, and I grab the rest. We carefully walk down the cramped stairs to the basement, with the other two already comfortable on the old couch. 

Lucas tosses the food down on the table, and flops on the couch next to Max. I turn the TV on, and screw around with the controls for a bit. I moved it down here from the living room this morning, just because it's easier to have movie night in the basement. Less chance of Nancy or Mom walking through and bothering us, y'know? I throw the chips I was holding onto the table, and pull out my first movie: A Nightmare on Elm Street. If we have time, I've also got The Thing, and Poltergeist. We probably won't though. Whatever. 

I start the movie up, and turn around just in time to see Dustin leaning over the arm of the chair and grabbing the Cheetos bag out of Max's lap, his camp Know Where hat slipping over his eyes. 

"Jerk! Give 'em back!" 

"When I'm done. Besides, you stole my pudding yesterday." 

"Hey! You deserved that, you didn't give my pen back! That was my good pen!" 

I sit on the couch, squishing myself between Lucas and the arm of the couch, and interrupt them, because, while this bickering is kinda funny, the movie has already started. "Guys, shut up. You're missing the movie." 

They shut up, kind of, still glaring at each other. And we watch the movie in relative peace and quiet, and soon enough they've both completely forgotten their argument. Max glances at the clock as the movie ends, and grimaces. Her curfew is soon, and no matter how much she hates it, she has to go home. Her curfew's been in place since Billy died, her parents got all overprotective because of it. 

"Bye nerds. See ya tomorrow, I guess." She leans down to hug Lucas, and waves at me and Dustin. She runs up the stairs, and she's gone. I put in Poltergeist, since it's not really that late. It's almost 9, really. Mom won't care that much. Probably. 

I settle back in my seat, grab some soda, and keep on watching the movie. It's pretty funny for a horror movie, honestly, and it's one of my favorites. 

My mom yells down the stairs, about halfway through the movie. Dustin's mom called, and he has to go home. He groans, and slowly pushes himself out of the chair. "See you guys tomorrow" 

"See ya Dusty-bun" Lucas giggles. He's never gonna let Dustin forgot that, ever. Dustin flips him the bird as he walks out. I chuckle, and turn back to the movie. 

Later, Lucas lets out the loudest yawn I've ever heard. "Jesus dude, how tired are you?" 

"Shut up Mike." 

"Whatever dude. Sounds like you need a nap though." I snicker. Lucas might be the one yawning,but I'm pretty tired too. I haven't slept much since Will went missing the first time, and when the MindFlayer returned, I've been sleeping even less. So I'm usually always tired. The movie's almost over anyway. 

As soon as the movie ends, Lucas shuts over the TV. 

"My mom said it's cool if I stay the night tonight. Does your mom mind?" 

"Probably not. I'll ask anyway." 

I run up the stars into Mom's room "is it cool if Lucas stays over tonight?"

She glances over at Dad, who just nods and goes back to reading. "Yes, I suppose. Just make sure you two aren't late for school tomorrow." 

"Alright. Good night. "

"Goodnight Mike." Mom replies. Dad doesn't even look up, just mutters something unintelligible. It's fine. I run back down the stairs and tell Lucas, and we run up to my room. I fall down on my bed, and Lucas drags some extra blankets out of the closet. He throws them in a pile by my bed, and sits down. We talk for awhile about comics and whether Superman could beat Batman. I think Batman totally could, but Lucas thinks Superman would win. The fight ends eventually, when Nancy bursts in to tell us to "shut up and go to bed already." I roll my eyes, but I change and get under the covers. Lucas does the same, and eventually he falls asleep. I try, I close my eyes, I count sheep, I toss and turn, but I just cannot stay asleep. Everytime I close my eyes I see the MindFlayer. I see Eleven, choking to death at the hands of the Flayed. I see Will's body being dragged out of that lake. I stare at the ceiling, trying to think of something else. Anything else. School, the movies we watched, and I wonder if El has seen Poltergeist, I think she'd like it, I know Will has, he likes the movie, shit. 

Suddenly, Lucas gasps and sits up, trying to catch his breath. 

"Dude, are you okay?" He's silent for a bit, and his ragged breaths are the only noise in the room besides the wind. 

After awhile, he seems to regain his breath. "Just a bad dream dude, it's nothing." After another quiet, long minute, he opens his mouth. "Why are you still up?" 

"Couldn't sleep. It's fine." I shrug. Really, it is. I'm used to not sleeping through the night, and I don't want him to worry. He tries to hide behind this tough, chill mask, but really, he cares a lot. I know he cried after Will's 'funeral'. I know that because he cried to me. Or rather, on me, really. We were younger then, and I guess we felt like we couldn't let anyone else see us being weak. 

"Man, it's way too early. I can't go back to bed now, it's like 4 am! I'm gonna be up in two hours anyway." I just nod in agreement. It is way too fucking early to be reminded of what we went through. 

We stare at each other in silence for a bit, and some part of me wishes I could hug him. I don't know why, but he looks... scared. He's almost never scared, and if he is, he doesn't show it. He's the tough one. I think that if I hug him he might be less scared. 

I ignore that thought though, because I know Lucas wouldn't want it. He thinks it makes him less tough. I guess it he's right. Boys just can't be... affectionate, at least not like how girls can. It's just not allowed. 

So I sit up, and get out of bed. 

"Wanna watch 'The Evil Dead' again?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah this is kind of a filler chapter, I know. But it made me soft and I wanted to have the other kids show up more. Also I'm mad that Lucas doesn't have more character development in the show, because he's pretty darn cool. Enjoy!!! 
> 
> Also please leave comments I love them so much!!! Even just a kudos makes my day!! 
> 
> Also PS: please, someone....give Mike a hug. For fucks sake, this boy is so touch-starved.


	4. Thunderstorm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mike ignores most of history class, Lucas gets in trouble, Max is hilarious as always, and Dustin's a history nerd. 
> 
> And then Mike tries to finish building Castle Byers in a storm.

"Mike."  
"Mike."  
.  
.  
.  
"Mr. Wheeler." I turned my head to to front, and staring straight into the face of Mrs. Crayne, the freshman history teacher. 

"Oh joy, he's not deaf." She chuckles, and adjusts her glasses. "Now, Mr. Wheeler, when did the Civil War end?" 

"1865" I'm so bored in this class, and Mrs. Crayne seems to have something against me and the rest of the party. Which really bothers Dustin, because he really does like history, but this teacher could ruin even the most fun of topics. 

"When in 1865, Mike?" Oh shit. I know it was sometime in April, but that's about it. I can see Dustin and Louise Pendergrass both vying for first place in Mrs. Crayne's attentions.

"Uhhh, April?" Mrs. Crayne looks like she has never been more annoyed than at this exact moment. 

"Don't get smart with me now, Michael Wheeler. You should know this." Her voice takes on that edge it gets when she's really mad, and probably writing out a note to your parents in her head already, just waiting for you to do something that she can punish you for. "Now, when, exactly, did the Civil War end?" 

"I don't know, I just know it was in April, in 1865." She sighs, and turns around, moving to her desk. 

"Does anyone who was paying attention now when the Civil War ended?" She scans the room like a hawk looking for its next meal. Louise is practically bouncing in her seat trying to get Mrs. Crayne's attention. "Yes, Louise ?" Lousie smiles from the front row, and rattles the answer off the top of her head. 

"The Civil War ended on April 6th, 1865." 

"Correct." I've already lost interest. I stare at my striped notebook, my eyes following and tracing the lines. I look up at the clock. Ten minutes left, and then school's out. I told Dad I'd be out after school and I probably wouldn't be back for dinner. Mom's gone for a few days, to help her sister, who broke her arm and can't watch her baby. The view outside is cloudy and gray, and the news has been talking about a thunderstorm all week. Dad won't really notice if I'm not at home tonight. He probably won't even make dinner, and Nancy will have to make Mac and cheese or something again, just like the last two days. Which works for me, honestly. If he doesn't care, then he won't bother me about what I'm doing. 

I look up at the clock again. 8 minutes left. This class always seems like the longest, like it takes actual years. I cannot wait to get out of here. Mrs. Crayne drones on and on, I guess we've got homework, and the sheet of paper in front of me blurs. I rub my eyes sleepily, and slowly write the homework down. The bells rings as I write down the last of the questions, and I shove everything into my bag. I run out the door, ignoring Mrs. Crayne's glare directed right at me, and push through the crowded hallways. Dustin and Max meet up with me near the front door. 

"Where's Lucas?" I look around, realizing that he's not even close to the bikes, and I don't see his dad's car in the parking lot, so he's not getting picked up today, probably. I saw him this morning, and at lunch, and he looked fine, so he's probably not sick, but I can't be sure. Max answers almost immediately. 

"Idiot got in trouble with Mr. Wessman and now he's staying after to clean up." She smiles a little, and I know that, whatever he did, he probably did it to make her laugh. "He took the fake skeleton off Mr. Wessman's wall and pretended to dance with it while Mr. Wessman was out of the class, but Mr. Wessman came back in and Lucas dropped it" she bursts into laughter, mid-sentence, at the memory of the shattered dancing skeleton. It is pretty funny. "and, and the skeleton fucking shattered!" she stops again, catching her breath, still laughing. "so now Mr. Wessman is tearing him apart. It was hilarious, Mr. Wessman's face was bright red! I thought he was gonna explode!!" Her face is also bright red from laughter, and Dustin and I laugh along, thinking about Lucas, stuck in the chemistry room with Mr. Wessman, who is often described by Dustin and Lucas as a 'Midget Orc with anger issues.' Max waves her hands around, trying to get our attention again. 

"Dude he looked like, so pissed. He looked like this." And with that, she does a pretty accurate impersonation of Mr. Wessman's angry face. We all practically fall over laughing at that, and for awhile, all is well. 

Eventually, we catch our breath and get back on our bikes. 

"Shouldn't we wait for him?" Dustin interjects, pulling his bike off the ground. 

"Nah, he'll be there for awhile. Mr. Wessman is making him fix the skeleton, and Mr. Wessman's probably gonna make him write a hundred lines of 'I will not dance with, and then break, my chemistry teacher's fake skeleton', or something like that." Max says, circling around us on her skateboard. I look at Dustin, shrug, and start biking away. 

"Hurry up, stalkers, I wanna get home before it rains!" And then Max leaves us in the dust. Her house is on the other side of town, so we wave at her retreating figure and bike to our houses. Well, except for that as soon as Dustin arrives at his driveway, plans for the next movie night and Halloween are exchanged, and goodbyes are said, I bike over to Castle Byers. 

I stop by the woods around it, and walk through the brush until I see it. It's raining steadily now, but it's still light out, and the walls I fixed on Saturday are still holding up. I just have to finish the last wall, and then the roof, and the opening thingy. And then once that's all done, I'll get an extra canvas tarp from Dad's workshop. It's not like he uses those things anyway. I'll also bring the extra blankets and pillows that I hid in my room just for this. I pull the branches that I left over from Saturday, and I drag them in place on the left wall, which is only a branch or two away from being finished. Then, once that's done, I work on the last wall. This is pretty easy, now that I've gotten the hang of it. It's getting dark out, but the sun hasn't set yet, and that storm that everyone's worried about hasn't happened yet either. It is pretty fucking cold though. I pull the hood of my rain jacket a little closer around me, and I keep working. 

A couple hours later, I'm almost halfway through the roof when thunder cracks nearby, and the lightning lights up the sky for a second, so I place one last branch on top, and run under it. The roof is just big enough to cover me, if I curl up. I can't bike home in this weather, but if I stay here all night I could get sick. This internal argument goes on for awhile, while I count the beats between the thunder and lightning, getting shorter and shorter. It's getting closer, and the pouring rain reminds me of the last time I was her with Will, after the argument. I hadn't really meant to say those things, but I did. I can't take it back, no matter how much I wish I could. I didn't think that it would hurt Will. But it did. His eyes, his whole face just showed so much hurt, and something else that I couldn't quite understand, hidden far underneath. Then, I thought it looked like fear, but it couldn't have been. 

And then, I tried to fix it, I went over to his house, in rain like this, and then we found him out in Castle Byers. His favorite place, a place where he felt safe when nowhere else offered him that feeling. And it was destroyed. It had gotten even worse in the weeks he was gone, a small tornado swept through the town, on the same day he told us he was moving, and that El was coming with him. That was about a week before he actually left, two months ago. Two months without two of my best friends. 

I shook my head, trying to get away from those thoughts before I cry again, and I decide right there to just stay the night here.  
I curl up tighter, my arms around my knees, pulling them close to my chest, and my head ducked down, watching the patterns of the water on the ground. My backpack is already soaked through, but it's all I've got, so I lay it down and uncurl myself, laying on the cold wet ground. And even though it's uncomfortable, and cold, and likely to give me pneumonia, I feel like I'm home, kind of. I fall asleep peacefully, for the first time in years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all like this chapter!! I think that Lucas just likes to make Max laugh honestly, and does not hesitate to get in trouble if it means she'll laugh. And Lucas is kind of a class clown. 
> 
> Also, I researched the scene where Will destroys Castle Byers, and honestly that thing held up pretty well, but I needed slightly more destruction. So, tornado. And Indiana did actually get a tornado in July, 1984. It actually had 2 in July of 1984. So Yeah. Also, I don't know the exact day they moved, so I'm just saying they moved in August, a bit before school started. Right now, it's set in October, but later chapters will be in November, and maybe Christmas time??? 
> 
> But anyway, I hope you all like this chapter! Leave a kudos or a comment if you wanna, those make my day!!


	5. Don't bother me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another filler chapter, with Mike brooding and isolating himself at his Nana's house. But also a better idea of just how much Will and his friends mean to Mike.

I drag myself out the door and into the car as Mom buckles Holly in. I try to keep my disappointment off my face, but Mom notices. 

“Mike, I know you’re upset that can’t spend the day in your room ignoring everyone else, but it’s Nana’s birthday, and you are going to smile and act like you’re having a good time, or else you’ll actually have something to mope about.” I just sigh, sinking lower in my seat. Dad nods in agreement from the driver's seat. 

“Listen to your mother, Mike.” I roll my eyes but stay quiet, staring out the window as everyone gets in and we leave the driveway. I watch the houses speed by, then the trees and farms, and then back to houses and small businesses. It goes back and forth between towns and forests for hours, as Holly sleeps and wakes and cries, and Nancy reads and sighs wistfully and hums along to the radio, and I try not to explode. I’ve just been really short-tempered lately, and I’m not really sure why. I just wish one of them would listen to me. Nance might listen, but she’s got her own problems to worry about, with college and job-searching and senior year bullshit. I could talk to Holly. At least I know she wouldn’t tell anyone, chuckling under my breath, just quiet enough for no one else to hear me over the noise. 

My head snaps up as we pull in to Nana’s driveway, some time later. However disappointed I am that I can’t work on Castle Byers, or watch a new movie with Lucas and Max, or hangout in the back room at the movie rental store with Steve and Dustin and Robin, I do like going over to Nana’s. She always spoils me and she’s got some really weird old stuff in her attic. It’s always interesting going over Nana’s house, even though she spends most of the day at home. Nana’s waiting at the door, and I can see the TV through the window. Mom and Dad are the first ones in, with Holly trailing on their heels, then Nancy, then me, shuffling my feet across the concrete of the short driveway. 

Nana lives on the outskirts of town, and she’s lived alone with her dog Mac since her husband, Mom’s dad, died from a heart attack. Mac’s a little black bulldog, and he’s named Mac because his favorite food is mac and cheese. He’s pretty smart for a dog, and Gramps taught him a lot of different tricks before he died. Mac runs out and launches himself at my legs, demanding attention. Mac is the most spoiled dog in the history of dogs, and he always has to be the center of attention. It’s kinda cute though. I pick him up and walk into the living room, flopping down on the couch. The TV is playing one of those weird daytime soap operas that Nana loves. I like watching them on silent and making up my own stories, complete with weird voices and more monsters than a slasher movie. I’m bored, so that’s what I do for now, pretending that Mac is the lady on screen, and whispering my made-up story under my breath. 

“I’m so sorry, Patrick, but I can’t hide it anymore...I’m an alien!” I laugh again and clear my throat for the next scene, lifting Mac up so we’re at eye level. 

“Oh, Edith, how could you? I loved you! I can’t believe I loved an...an alien! You liar!” I laugh harder, and Mac jumps off my lap, like he’s tired of my story. Whatever, I don’t need him, since it’s an ad break now, and Nance just walked in, nose in a book. I sit there a minute, moving to the floor and then to the kitchen, grabbing a cookie and greeting Nana before running up the stairs to the second floor, then climbing the ladder to the attic. The attic is my favorite place at Nana’s. 

There’s boxes of pictures, some old books, chests of old clothes, and my favorite, the old record player with mom’s old records. There’s The Beatles, Johnny Cash, Buddy Holly, and The Beach Boys, mostly. I throw a Beatles record on the player, and let it spin as I lay on the cold wood floor of the attic. I hum along to the opening chords and roll onto my stomach, grabbing one of the books off the pile near my head

 _“Oh yeah, I'll tell you somethin'_  
_I think you'll understand_  
_When I say that somethin'_  
_I want to hold your hand_  
_I want to hold your hand_  
_I want to hold your hand_  
_Oh please, say to me_  
_You'll let me be your man_  
_And please, say to me_  
_You'll let me hold your hand_  
_Now, let me hold your hand_  


I try to keep my mind on the book, but I’ve read it before and my mind feels...foggy today. Like it’s somewhere else. I shake my head and focus on the book, because someone is about to get murdered and Poirot is going to solve it in some weird, convoluted way. I get about half-way through before I decide I don’t care anymore. 

The record stops and I get up to flip it over, kicking up dust around me. I flip it and lay back down, watching the dust float around in the sunlight that’s streaming through the small window. 

_“Since she's been gone I want no one to talk to me_  
_It's not the same but I'm to blame, it's plain to see_  
_So go away, leave me alone, don't bother me_  
_I can't believe that she would leave me on my own_  
_It's just not right when every night I'm all alone_  
_I've got no time for you right now, don't bother me_  
_I know I'll never be the same if I don't get her back again_  
_Because I know she'll always be the only girl for me_  
_But 'til she's here please don't come near, just stay away_  


My mind drifts to Will. Again. Honestly, I’ve been thinking about Will even more since he left. I mean, yeah, I miss him and all, but I feel like I’ve been thinking about him too much for it to be normal. It’s probably just because I’ve known him all my life, he’s just...always been there, y’know? I never thought about having to live without him. Every time I look up in class, there’s a half-second where I expect to see him looking back at me, smiling. Every time I answer a comm, there’s a little part of me that replays the conversations me and Will had on the comms some nights, long after the other two were asleep. Trying our best to ignore the yelling down the hall, in the years before Lonnie ran off with a girl half his age. Talking about the newest comic book and planning the next D&D session. Wondering about our futures, talking about cool jobs we’d have and the colleges we’d go to, and all the cool things we’d do when we got older. We also promised that we’d all stay friends, all of us. I couldn’t imagine a world where we weren’t friends, where we didn’t talk everyday. And now, here it is. And I don’t know how to handle it without crying. 

And now that he’s gone, it feels like I’m missing a part of me. 

Nancy’s head pops out of the trapdoor. “Oh, there you are. It’s time for lunch. Mom ordered pizza.” I sit up off the floor and nod, still mopey. 

“We’re leaving after lunch though, Dad’s got work tomorrow and it’ll take hours before we get home.” I nod again, dragging myself to my feet and down the ladder, towards a mostly uneventful lunch, then goodbyes, then all of us climbing in the car as Nana and Mac wave us off. Towards another several hour car ride home, then flopping on my bed and sleeping through dinner, waking long after dinner, when the night sky is dark enough to cast shadows everywhere in my room. I stare up at the ceiling, shaking another nightmare out of my head. I roll over, squinting at my alarm clock, the only source of light besides the moon. It’s late. It’s actually early, if we’re being technical, but still. It’s late. I roll over again, trying to sleep. It’s pointless now, but I might as well try. But every time I close my eyes I see El, helpless on the ground, and I see Will’s body being dragged out of the river, and I see Dustin and Lucas and Max fighting for their lives, and I see Nancy and Jonathan being attacked by The Flayed, and I see Steve and Robin being tortured by scientists, and I see all of us, the only thing standing between monsters that no one should ever have to fight. I toss and turn until morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honestly my favorite character so far is Mac. he's the best. but anyway, enjoy this chapter!! Also, school is starting up soon, so I'm going to update every other Tuesday instead of every Tuesday. sorry yall.


	6. Letters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mike finally finishes Castle Byers, but the story's not over yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry this is late, I've been really really busy lately and I wanted to make sure that I edited this chapter before I posted it! I hope you guys like it though, even though it's a little short.

I shove the last branch into place on the front wall, and tie the extra blanket over the opening. I duck under, and crawl in, dragging the bag of blankets and pillows. I set the blankets over the tarp I stole from Dad, and pile the pillows in the far corner. I curl up against the wall and pull my textbook out. Geometry is actually killing me, and I've got a test in two days. I start on the first question. 

The exterior angle x is 75°, blah blah blah. Find y and all angles, waste your life on math you probably won't need unless you wanna be an engineer or something. And I don't. I don't know what I want, but it's not anything that involves too much math. 

But, Mom will freak if I fail another test, so I'm stuck spending my afternoon doing this shit. Good thing I stole Nancy’s walkman, or else I would be bored out of my mind more than I already am. Rummaging around my bag, I grab a cassette and press play, drowning out my thoughts. 

I do actually try to do my homework, for a bit at least, but soon enough my mind drifts. I look around the finally finished Castle, and something that kinda feels like pride swells in my heart. It’s a little smaller than the original, and it doesn’t have the pictures and art that it had before, but it’s still Castle Byers. Smiling to myself, I set my textbook aside and start drawing, absentmindedly. I’m not as good as Will is, but it’ll work. And I can bring pictures from home, although there’s not much I can do about the signs, since I don’t have any paint. Oh well. I sketch some more, adding to the eyes and the hands. I look closer at the drawing, which was originally supposed to be a npc from our latest D&D game, but it looks too much like Will, so I draw his wizard cape and his stupid hat that his mom made him, and it’s Will the Wise. I move on to Lucas’s character, Sir Lucas. He’s a Ranger, although he was a Knight when we first started. Rangers are pretty cool though. I rummage around my bag, looking for the right shade for Lucas’s bow, and realize that the sun is setting. 

“Shit shit shit.” oh, Mom’s gonna be so pissed. I throw my stuff in my bag and grab my bike, riding home as fast as I can, zooming past the houses and trees until I reach my door, tired and out of breath. I burst in the front door, and everyone looks up from the table, where it looks like they’re finishing dinner. 

“Hi?” I mutter, hoping that Mom’s in a good mood today. 

“Michael James Wheeler! Where on earth have you been? I called Lucas an dDustin and neither of them knew where you were! I even called that Max girl, and Mr. Clarke! What have you been doing all afternoon! It’s almost 8!” She stops, catching her breath. She’s definitely not in a good mood. “You better have a good explanation for this, young man, or you’ll be grounded for so long. Do you know how worried I was?” 

I stare at the floor. “Sorry Mom. I was just biking around, and I stopped at the arcade. I didn’t realize how late it was until John told me I should probably leave.” I look up, and her face is a bit softer, but still annoyed. “I biked her as fast as I could. That part is true, and she can see that, in my ragged breath and the hair sticking to my sweaty forehead. 

“Alright, but next time, at least call me. I know there’s still a payphone near the front.” I silently high-five myself in my head, walking to the table. 

“Oh no young man, don’t think you’re out of trouble. Go to your room and think about what you’ve done. Your mother nearly had a heart attack.” Dad doesn’t even look up from his plate. I sigh loudly, dragging myself up the stairs. Whatever. I slam my door, and fall onto my bed, throwing my bag on the floor, wallowing in teenage angst. 

A few minutes later, Nancy comes up. She knocks gently on the door, waiting for an answer that I don’t give. 

“Goodnight Mike.” She walks off, and then suddenly stops. “I almost forgot. A letter came for you today.” She slides the envelope under my door, and walks off again. I hear her door close, and scramble off the bed, hoping it’s from Will or El. 

And it is. I rip open the envelope, holding the letter tight. There’s actually two letters, one from Mike and one from El. I read El’s first. It’s pretty short, and her handwriting isn’t great. But neither is mine, so who cares. I guess their new house is pretty cool. She stays home most of the time, just in case, but there’s a cool park near the new house, and she likes to sit there and swing. She doesn’t mention her powers, at all, so it’s probably safe to say they haven’t come back yet. I know they will though. It’s just like all the other times she used a bunch of power, and then had to recharge. It’s just this time is a lot longer than the others, y’know. 

Will’s letter is longer. His new school is much bigger than Hawkins high, but the kids are just as bad. He’s made a friend though, a kid from his math class named Stan. I’m glad he’s making friends, and Stan sounds pretty cool. Jonathan and his mom are doing well, and he’s made El watch all the Star Wars movies. El makes him watch those weird westerns she likes though, so it’s an even trade. And when Mike comes home from school, he teaches El reading and writing and math and all that, just because she wants to learn.

And he misses me. He misses the rest of the party, and our D&D games and our movie nights, and he wishes that he was able to do group costume with us this halloween. And he misses me.

I hold the letters to my heart. It feels like a hug, like this is the closest thing I’ve got to two of my closest friends holding me in their arms. I read the letters again, and again, and again, until the words swim on the page and my vision worsens, forcing me to stop reading and slip the letters under my pillow. I miss them. I ignore the low, empty feelings spreading through my stomach and chest, and close my eyes, whispering goodnight to the letters, and hoping irrationally that, somehow, they’ll hear me.


	7. Halloween morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A v short Halloween morning chapter.

I shoved the last of my costume in my backpack. I know no one wears a costume to school now, but Dustin insisted that we go to his house and get ready right after school, and I don't mind. Especially because his mom always has the best candy. 

But it means lugging around my costume the whole time. Whatever. It’s a cool costume. I sling my bag over my shoulder and run out the door, ignoring the grumble of my empty stomach. I’ll be fine. 

I rush up to Lucas, who's mom is much stricter about getting to school on time, flying across the street to meet him. I coast in front of him, my momentum dragging me along. 

"Dude, slow down! You almost ran me over!" 

"Did not! Maybe I wouldn't have to rush to catch up with you if your mom didn't make you leave so fuckin early." I can't see his face from here, but I know he's rolling his eyes at me. He's perfected his eye-rolling technique, honestly. Probably due to all the shit his little sister does all the time. 

"Guys slow down!" I do try to slow down as I pass Dustin's, but I'm still floating lazily ahead and there's not much I can do to go slower as I round the corner. "I said slow down, idiots!" 

"Yeah yeah, we heard you Dusty-bun. Chill it." Lucas calls from Dustin's side. 

"You guys all have your costumes, right?" A bored but unanimous "Yes" rings out, with another, slightly higher-pitched voice added to mine and Lucas's. We turn to see Max doing gentle, slow circles on the vacant street. 

"I brought my nerd costume, Dusty, don't you worry." Max took to calling him Dusty awhile after the Suzie thing. She (and literally all of his other friends) had obviously started calling him Dusty-bun, not willing to let this prime teasing opportunity to pass by. But she'd gotten tired of it lately, and started calling him Dusty, saying "what? I'm used to calling him Dusty-bun, but that's kinda annoying now. Besides, it's a good nickname." 

"Awesome! Let's go, come on!!" Literally Dustin is the only person that could be excited for school, but we still follow him onto the bleak, cracked pavement of the school parking lot, and up into the tall, cold metal doors of the school. 

The rest of the day passes quietly, although Mr. Wessman did put a Halloween costume on his newly repaired skeleton. And the lunchroom had half-hearted Halloween decorations up, like someone kinda tried to decorate but got bored and half-assed it. 

But even with all the Halloween excitement, the day drags on. It seems like years before each class ends. But finally, finally, the last bell rings and I run through the pushing, shoving masses of sweaty teens, and jump on my bike. Dustin's already there, for reasons unknown, since his last class is literally on the other side of school, but whatever. We talk aimlessly but excitedly about tonight's plans, as Max and Lucas walk up to us. 

"Come on, if we hurry we'll have time to watch a movie before we trick or treat!!" And with that, we all ride off, following Dustin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaa I'm sorry this is so late and short!! Rehearsal for the school play has started up and I'm just super busy I'm sorry!! 
> 
> But, to make it up to y'all, next update will have be least two new chapters, maybe more if I get time!! So October 1st, expect the rest of the Halloween chapters, and possibly more!!


	8. The best night of the year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Halloween night!! Happy first of October (aka spooky season!)

We ran out of Dustin’s house, running on adrenaline and anticipation, fully costumed although it was only 7. I was Darth Vader, Dustin was Lando Calrissian, Lucas was Han Solo, and Max was Leia. She wanted to be Chewbacca, but her parents insisted that she be a girl character this year, since the last year she dressed up she was Michael Myers, and they’re boring. 

"Trick or treat!" We yelled in unison at the first house on our route. We stood at the door, as the owner, dressed up like Frankenstein, handed us bags of Skittles. The sky, just barely darkening in the background, and the slight breeze that rustled the trees, made us shiver. We ran to the next house. And the next. And the next. And the next, on and on until we got the best part of trick-or-treating: The Maple Street cul-de-sac. 

The Maple Street cul-de-sac has the best treats. Full size candy bars, caramel apples, the good popcorn balls (not the gross ones that smell weird), and one house even hands out the big theater boxes of candy every year. Of course that house has a long line of kids dressed up ready for candy, and so we’re waiting around at the end of their driveway. Dustin and Lucas are busy rummaging through the candy they’ve already got, and trading with each other. Max is poking the giant fake spider on their equally giant lawn, and I’m standing around, being bored. At least we’re near the end of our route. I just wanna gorge myself on candy and watch The Thing for the 27th time, like last year.

I feel some kid bump into me and then rush past me to his friends. Huh. They’re dressed as the Ghostbusters. Last halloween flashes in my head, like a poorly made, kinda sad movie. Us walking around, just like tonight, except with five instead of the four of us. Me, being, I guess, kinda jealous of Max and how much they all seemed to like her. Mike, falling over after Troy and the rest of his friends yelled at him and got in his face. Mike, having his second episode, all alone on the cold hard ground in the Upside-Down. 

When I realized he wasn’t with me, my heart stopped a little. I ran back, retracing my steps until I found him. He was curled up, with his knees up to his chest as he hyperventilated and shook. He didn’t come to immediately, just looked around blankly, like he was looking at a whole different place, which he was, kinda. When he finally realized, it was like he woke up from a long sleep. I dragged him home, his arm around my shoulder and my arm around his waist to keep him up. 

When I looked back up, Dustin and Max were almost at the door, but Lucas was at my side, worriedly. 

“You alright dude?” 

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. Just got kinda spaced out, y’know.” He squinted at me, as if he wasn’t too sure about my answer. 

“Alright. Come on, you’re gonna miss all the candy.” We walk up to the door, shoulder-to-shoulder, just after they hand Max and Dustin candy. Max stops, and whispers something I can’t quite make out, and Dustin just stands by her for a minute, making his worried face. Lucas just nods at Max, and her and Dustin walk down to the end of the driveway and wait. That was weird. They’re probably just worried about me. I guess I have been kinda weird lately. 

After Lucas and I get our candy, we go to the last two houses on the cul-de-sac, then we make our way back to Dustin’s, stopping at Max’s house. We wave goodbye, as her and Lucas hug for just long enough for me and Dustin to be a little uncomfortable. At Dustin’s, my mind is still kinda stuck on last Halloween, but I’m also very focused on our current candy trade war. Candy trading is a very serious business, and Dustin and Lucas are fighting over the last king-sized Twix. And I’m laughing at them from the couch, wrapped in a blanket, as Poltergeist plays quietly in the background. It’s kinda peaceful. 

But I’m still...I don’t know. Empty, I guess. Not like, really empty, like I did when I thought Mike was dead and I was mad at El for lying at me. But empty enough for it to hurt a little. I ignore Lucas and Dustin’s occasional looks in my direction, and just absentmindedly eat candy and watch tv, until my eyes get too heavy to keep open. Dustin yawns and drags Lucas to the living room to grab more pillows and blankets. I pull my hoodie closer to me and lie on the couch, and wait. My eyes close almost as soon as my head hits the couch, just before they walk back in, blankets in hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello I love all of you so much and I'm about to crash from being hyper and living on caffeine for the past week, see y'all in two weeks! Enjoy two chapters of these nerds


	9. Lucas gets worried

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the day after Halloween, and Lucas realizes something's wrong with Mike. He recruits Dustin to help him figure it out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!! This is a special chapter and it's from Lucas's point of view so enjoy!! It's a little short and very dialogue heavy, but I hope you guys like it!

"He's not answering my comms. And he was being really weird yesterday, I know you saw that!" I paced around my room, while Dustin sat cross-legged on my bed and looked slightly worried. 

"Dude, he was probably just remembering last Halloween. I mean, it wasn't a great time for any of us that year. But like, him and Will got the short stick." Dustin unwraps, eats, and grabs another candy bar. "He's probably fine, he's just having a bad day, y'know?" 

"Yeah, but he's just been weird recently, not just yesterday. And he always answers my comms." Dustin rolls his eyes. 

"Maybe he'll pick up if I do it, alright? He's probably just sleeping." Dustin grabs his radio from his bag and comms Mike. A few static minutes later, no answer. 

"I told you! He's been acting strange lately, I know it. I think something's wrong with him."

"Like how something is wrong with Will? Because if the demogorgon comes back right now, we're totally screwed."

"No, no, not like Will. I just think something's wrong with him. I mean, he's been super spacey lately, and he's really quiet. He doesn't even want to go to the movies anymore. All he does is stay at home." I catch my breath, still pacing. "Although, it might have something to do with Will. I mean, they're like...super close, they always have been. It's like if I moved away and you were stuck here. And El left with him, so he's probably like... super sad about her too, y'know?" 

I stop pacing. 

"Okay, but like, what are we supposed to do about it? He's clearly not gonna tell us what the problem is. What can we do if he doesn't want us to help? He's not even talking to us right now?" 

"I don't know. I'd ask Max, she'd know what to do. She's smart when it comes to stuff like this." Dustin gags a little. "Shut up, you're just jealous because I get to see my girlfriend every day. Your's is in a whole different state." 

"No, you're just being gross, Lucas. Gross and sappy. You sound like a girl." 

"Shut up, Dusty-bun." 

"Shut up Lucas." He stops, thinking a little. "Max probably would be helpful though, if we're dealing with an emotional problem. Can you radio her?" 

"No, I'll just talk to her tomorrow at school." 

He nods. "Okay then. Tomorrow, after school, we'll create our battle plan for Operation Make Mike Less Sad About His Closest Friend and His Girlfriend Moving. Or Operation MMLSAHCFAHGM."

I roll my eyes until they're about to fall out of my head. "Absolutely not, dude. Just shorten it to Operation: Make Mike Less Sad." 

"Fine"


	10. The plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max, Lucas, and Dustin discuss the beginnings of a plan to help their friend, and also suffer through crappy cafeteria food. In Lucas's point of view again.

"Max." I kicked her seat from behind. "Max"

"What?" She growls under her breath. 

"I need your help." I shove a note in her hands just before the homeroom teacher steps in. She glared at me, cramming the note into her pocket. Hopefully she'll read it before lunch and she'll know what to do. Homeroom passes as boringly as every other fuckin day, and I meet up with Dustin at his locker before first period. 

"Dude, Mike's not here today. I didn't see him in homeroom." Worriedly, Dustin grabs his books, and almost drops them in nervousness. 

"He's fine okay, he's probably sick or something, ate too much candy y'know?" I unlocked my locker with a click. "Besides, this gives us more time to discuss the plan with Max." 

"Yeah I know, I know. I was thinking about it and he has been really weird lately, when you think about it, y'know?" 

"Yeah I know. Hopefully Max can help. If not, we might have to talk to Nancy or Steve or something." 

"Nancy could probably help though, she's his sister, she's gotta know something." 

I scoff. "Dude, if he's not tell us about it, he's definitely not telling his older sister." 

"I guess." Dustin shoulders his bag. "Shit dude we're gonna be late!" He turns and runs to his next class, cursing under his breath. My class is closer than his is, so I can take a nice, easy stroll right to history. History passes slowly, along with PE, then Algebra, and finally, lunch. 

I grab the weird cardboard pizza and soggy, lukewarm green beans from the lunch ladies, then weave my way to our table in the corner. Mike still isn't here, but Max is already sitting and looks lost in thought. I set my tray down and slide next to her. Before I do anything else though, I look around for Dustin or Mike. Dustin's still in the lunch line, but Mike is nowhere to be seen. 

As soon as he gets his lunch, Dustin rushes over, a little out of breath. "Are you gonna help?"

Max looks a little offended at that, like we'd dare think she wouldn't help us. "Of course I'll help, idiots. Mike's my friend too, alright."   
She pauses, pulling the crumpled note out of her jacket. "And of course he's sad. His girlfriend and one of his best friends moved, you dolts. Wouldn't you be sad if that happened?" She shoves the note back in her pocket. 

"Yeah, but what are we gonna do about it?" Dustin asks. She rolls her eyes, shoving pizza in her face. 

"We're not gonna do anything right now, stupid. We're just on reconnaissance for now. We need more information." 

"Okay, but he's not talking to any of us about anything. How are we gonna do recon? Stalk his house? Ask his sister?" I push the green beans around my tray with the flimsy plastic fork, just trying to keep my hands busy as I think. 

"Well we're not gonna stalk him, obviously. He'd notice. But we could probably ask his sister, that's not a bad idea." 

Dustin pipes up. "But wouldn't he also notice if we're at his house just to talk to his sister? He's not stupid." The table falls quiet for a minute, until Max opens her mouth again. 

"Hey, Nancy still talks to Steve a lot, right, Dustin?" Dustin nods, mouth full. 

"And you talk to Steve, right?" Dustin nods again. "So you could just tell him we're worried about Mike and ask if he could ask Nancy if she knows anything or if she's noticed something weird." She throws the rest of her food in the trash. "make sure he knows it's probably not anything to do with the Upside Down this time though. He doesn't need to be worried." Dustin and I nod in agreement and she smiles. 

"So it's settled then. You'll talk to Steve after school today, and then report back to me and Lucas. We'll meet at my house after dinner to discuss a further plan. Tell your parents we're studying." We both nod again, although I'm struck breathless by the quiet strength oh her voice. I guess that's one of the things that drew me to her, y'know? Just how strong she really is. And funny. And cute. God, Dustin's right. I'm so sappy when I'm around her. I'm not always good at, y'know, emotional stuff, and sometimes I say things wrong or sometimes she says something wrong and we fight, but we always make up. And I'm really glad she always does take me back, and I hope she's glad that I always take her back too.


	11. It's gonna be a long day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mike goes to school, does his history test, is miserable. Mike also has a run-in with Troy and James. It's not pleasant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I know I've been absent for like 9593 years, I love all of you!!! I am going to have a lot of chapters coming up over break to make up for being gone for so long, and once the new year rolls around I will try to stick to an actual schedule, hopefully. 
> 
> Also, there's some slurs in this chapter, so if anyone doesn't want to see homophobic slurs, (Fairy, f*g, Queer) I'll bold the beginning and end of that bit and a td;lr for y'all. But, we're getting closer to the thanksgiving chapter so be prepared for a feels trip! (about 6 chapters,if I don't change anything else lol)

I know it was stupid of me to skip yesterday, but I couldn't stand the thought of being in that hellhole. Unfortunately, today I have to go, because of my stupid history test. And Dustin is probably worried. He worries about literally everything ever. Honestly, I'm mostly showing up so that he knows I’m not dead in a ditch somewhere. So I throw my covers off, unenthusiastically brush my hair, and steal one of Nancy’s pancakes on my way out the door. 

When I meet up with Lucas, Max is by his side. They’re whispering, but when I skid to a stop next to Max, their heads snap up and they stop talking. I squint at them, trying to figure out what they could be talking about. 

“Whatcha talking about, lovebirds?” Lucas glances at Max, who nods. 

“Movie night, dingus. I wanna watch Back to the Future, but loser here wants to see Ghostbusters, again.” Max looks at Lucas. Lucas freezes for a second, like he’s unsure of what to say next, and starts stammering. 

“Uh...yeah, and, um, and we think that you and Dustin should be, y’know, the final votes, yeah.” His thumb ran over his index finger, and he only does that when he’s nervous. Or when he’s lying. I squint harder, but I’m not gonna get anything out of Lucas with Max around. I shrug my shoulders and let it go, for now. 

"Ghostbusters, obviously! Ghostbusters is only one of the best movies ever, like, in the history of ghost movies, it’s actually the coolest." Max sighs in disappointment as I crack a smile, and start biking away as they trail behind me. We meet up with Dustin, who looks suspiciously at Max. 

Yeah, they’re definitely planning something, but with how Max is acting, I’m not gonna get anything out of them. She’s in a mood. You can tell when she gets like this because she gets really closed off and she’ll wear her brother’s old jacket. One day she told me that she wears it because it reminds her of Billy and his memory helps her be strong. She also told me that she wears it because it makes her look tough, and that if I told anyone she’d tell my mom that I stole from her so that I could get tickets to The Goonies. 

But enough about their schemes or whatever. We’re almost to school, and anyway, they’re probably planning a prank on me or something. What if they hate you? Maybe they’ve finally gotten tired of you and decided to leave you in the dust? You’d be completely alone then, wouldn’t you? That one voice in my head whispers. I shush my stupid thoughts and chain my bike in place. Well, time to fail my history test. 

An hour later, the test is almost over, with only 5 minutes left in class. I’ve been stuck on this last stupid question for forever, so I just pick an answer and turn it in. At least this test was multiple choice. I make sure it’s got my name on it, and walk up to the front, setting it on the messy pile of everyone else’s tests, with 3 minutes to go. I yank my backpack out from under my desk, and zone out until the bell shakes me out of my mini-trace. On my way out of the class, I trip over something and fall, scratching my hands and face on the carpet. I look up to Troy’s smug laugh as I push myself off the ground. 

“Oh, did frogface trip over his own feet again?” Troy sneers at me, getting out of his chair. “Probably too busy thinking about his boyfriend to see where he’s going, right, James?” James nods from behind him, much taller and beefier than both of us, but still completely under Troy’s control. 

“Too bad your fairy boyfriend moved away. Bet he’s in some big city right now, dancing around with a bunch of other faggots.” 

“Shut. Up” I muttered. 

“Y’know, Troy, he’s probably one of those freaks that likes both. My mom told me about them, and you saw him at that snow ball with that weird girl. He just wants to be special. He’s such a freak that even the queers don’t want him.” 

I grip the straps of my backpack in anger. I bite the inside of my cheek and walk away, before I do anything that could get me in trouble. They shouldn’t be able to talk about Will and El like this. Sometimes I wish I had some sort of powers, I’d make their lives miserable. 

“Look at him, he’s about to cry! Fucking sissy.” James grabs my arm before I can get any farther. 

“Y’know, Troy, maybe we should give him something to actually cry about. The fag deserves it.” Troy looks out the glass of the classroom door. 

“Maybe later. the teacher’s on his way back, and I can’t get in trouble again.” James grips my arm a little tighter before letting go, giving one good punch to my stomach before walking out. I leave the room just as the teacher walks in, holding my ribs. There’s going to be a bruise there tomorrow.

I walk down to the bathrooms, to clean myself up. The mirrors are dirty, and the stalls are covered in graffiti and crudely scrawled sharpie messages, some about me and my friends. I don’t need to read them now. I study my face in the grimy mirror, running my fingers over the carpet burn on my cheek and the palms of my hands. My arm is a little sore from where James grabbed it, but it’s not bruising or even a little red. I lift my shirt up to the barely noticeable bruise on my side. It’ll look way worse tomorrow. 

I pull my shirt down and brush the hair out of my eyes. The door swings open and I run out, sliding into math at the last second. Lucas looks at me confused. 

“I’ll tell you later” I whisper across the aisle to him. Today’s going to be a long day. It’s barely even started and I’m already ready to go home and sleep. I might just sleep through movie night. Despite all my cells screaming at me to just sleep, I manage to keep my eyes open for math, and fro the rest of the day, right up until Ghostbusters is over and I’m full of junk food,and so so so sleepy. Max shakes me awake.

“Get up loser, before your mom files a missing persons report. Go home and get some sleep, dude, you clearly need it. “ Her voice softens, just a bit, near the end. She’s worried about me too, I know that. She’s just not very emotional about it. I drag myself up from the floor, out of her house, and bike home in the eerie twilight.

**Author's Note:**

> yes this is sad if u came here for comfort it's not coming until way later, sorry. Also the Mike/Eleven is all past. And most of the characters are only mentioned in the first couple of chapters. 
> 
> This started because I have a headcanon that after Will left, Mike started spending a lot of time at Castle Byers, trying to feel better. I think Mike's way of dealing with grief and sadness is ignoring it and pouring his energy into something else. So, fixing Castle Byers


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